Unsaid

Would you understand,
if I say how much I
want to hold your hand,
but i'm to shy...

Could you believe it,
when I say what I feel
are you able to perceive it?
do you know its real?

Should I let you know
how miserable it makes me
knowing you have to go,
and how time really hates me...

..And that just talking to you
for mere moments at a time...
and only the thought of you
still makes my face shine....

All things left unsaid
are things I guess I should say
to get them out of my head
to make me feel... okay ...

Dancing...

I don't feel like sitting here anymore, all alone in this cold, wet place. I don't want to talk about nonsense and laugh as if it were funny...
I want to dance. Slowly, softly; I want to wrap my arms around you and bury my face on your shoulders. I want to feel your arms tightly wrapped around me as we move slowly to the tune our heartbeats encore.
I don't care if people think it crazy that I want to hold you, just hold you; no words, no dirty thoughts, no awkward feelings. Just you, me and our heartbeats.
I feel like I could spin and twirl around the room, as long as I'm safely in your arms, tightly held close to you.
I want to feel your breath rushing over my neck; I want to hear you whispering... anything and everything that goes through your mind as we stare into each others eyes.
And with the last spin our lips meet, with a passionate embrace we say farewell. Waiting, expecting our next meeting... and with a sigh-- the connection cuts.

Day 5 and 6

Guyss... I'm soo sorry I only go to post this a bit late... you know, now that i'm back home first thing since i stepped in the house was study for my exams.... so yeah here we are for the last 2 days....

Day 5

• Checkout... We checked out of the hotel that day we had provisioned only 3 nights there, we had planned to stay the last night at my brother's home there in that beach town. so we checked out (after hours of packing everything in the car) and moved on.
• Shopping.... So we got to Zihuatanejo to visit my bro's home and on the way stopped at a store to do some shopping... I was gonna make a cake for the Family birthday but we decided it'd be better/cheaper and maybe yummier (but ofc not healthier) to just buy one so yeah we did.... and the adults got like all these beers and gave me none!!! :O:O meanos!
• My future home!... So yeah I guess I might be moving here sometime after Oct... hopefully, and that's my 'Stepping stone' Zihuatanejo... Gash the house is like sooo amazing I love it!! Its got like a swimming pool, the hammock place and all these nice tropical trees all over.... yeahhh sweet stuff!
• Pc time.... I was on the pc for some time there.... I got to talk to the most amazing ppl... and man it was soo nice -smiles-.... 
• Family birthday! ... So we celebrated the day with a super nice cookout (by Chris, Gabe, Mom, Abrek, Rose, Dan and all these other ppl.... lalala) man those ppl. really know their kitchen stuff!! (and i'm still pissed cause the adults were so mean and did not share their beers with me).
• A swim!... man the water was sooo cold but totally worth it.... (I missed some of the swimming fun cause i was talking to someone (incredibly important to me) over the chat, but I wouldn't have traded all the fun in the pool for that chat!) It was sooo fun, except for the fact that i left my rings on a chair and they disappeared...
• LJ time!... Dan had the most wonderful idea of like getting everyone together in the living room and have a special LJ time, where we said what we were thankful for the most about the family and sing some songs... amazing time!  I was so nervous already for talking out loud in front of all the ppl. that when they asked me to sing a song I couldn't be nervous anymore :P
• Communion... Dan had the nicest piece of bread to have a communion with and brought out the most amazing wine i had ever tasted, Dan, you're the man. :)
• Cake!! Yeps... it was chocolate! just like the one i didn't have for my birthday...but man was it soo yummy!!!
• My room... So I FINALLY got to sleep with Sandy and Susie!! yeah all this time and i hadn't had the chance to talk over night with them.. So we first finished watching love actually in my pc and then we watched music and lirycs, which btw was pretty cute. We slept with like these huge fans on and it was sooo freezing (even tho it was hot.... weird huh)! but we didn't turn the fans off cause of the evil evil mosquitoes....
• Staying up late Yeah after the 2 movies were done it was probably 2 am... but it still didn't matter...  (I thot it was too early to go to bed anyways) Sandy and I had a lot of things to catch up on and stuff... (I mean after like a week together and its STILL isn't enough) so we talked and talked until it was 4:30 and then we decided it was late enough to get some close-eye time

Day 6

• Wakey wakey!!.... Ugh so after going to sleep at 4:30, I woke up art 7... again.. (Yeah i know wtf?!) so yeah i woke up incredibly tired but yeah stayed in bed till like 9:30... between sleeping and awake...
• Breakfast... Oops... I missed breakfast... well no big deal I wasn't that hungry anyways... It was over before I got there so ummm... yeah breakfast was great
• Pack up... yeah so back to the room (which btw had no glass or screen on the door and the bathroom no light) and packed everything up for the trip, it didn't take so long... but my laptop had to be recharged cause I don't have a music player and i die when i go through hours of no music at all... so i recharged my laptop (well to a 75% cause we had to go) and was happy (for a while)
• Tripping... It was... a bit dull i was sooo tired i actually fell asleep... :O:O I never ever sleep in moving vehicles (cause i get movement sickness) so i think it was good i skipped breakfast... but what was good is that Sandy and Susie got to ride with me on the way to Morelia... hooray!! Thank god I actually had battery on my laptop and was able to listen to sum music with Sandy ... till the battery died...
• Morelia... So we got to Morelia (the city where Sandy and Susie live) and stopped there for lunch (and a laptop recharge) oh and btw lunch was awesome! (prob cause i was so hungry cause of the breakfast incident) I so loved the ham and cheese sandwiches Auntie made us. They were heaven.
• Stephie!!!- The only thing (or rather person) that was missing for this vacations to be the best i ever had... she was originally supposed to be kidnapped by Sandy and I to go to the beach but... yeah she also had tests and she actually studies for them... (so unlike me) and she was gonna do that while sandy and i had a blast at the beach (aackk i sound so selfish) so when I got to Morelia guess who came to give me the hug she was supposed to give me since my birthday?... Yups :) Stephie!! -jumps up and down in excitement- Yeps she not only gave me one hug but like three... :D:D and we took a picture in which looked hideous which i will not post for her (and my) sake... and we got to talk and i never finished :P lol oh well... "Stephie, Get your butt right here!!!!"-- I love you!!
• Road trippin'... So yeah thankfully my laptop's battery was recharged (altho not fully) and we (as in Johnny and I) got to listen to sum music on the way back to Queretaro... I have to say it was a little tight on the way back cause there wasn't uncle's car to distribute the ppl... so i had Johnny's uncomfortable legs over me... ugh... so i took another nap :O:O no... that was after i digested my lunch... just in case ... you know.. and we got back home
• Just as we came in the house.... I was told Go studyy!!! yeah school... ohh well
• (special feature..) Mexican City Names... By now you must have figured out that mexican people name their towns and cities soo oddly... like Ixtapa, Zihuatanejo (Try to pronounce that!), Morelia, Queretaro, Oh and those are the ones i mentioned... there are soo many i haven't and will not for the sake of briefness on this post (like if this post was meant to be brief)

Ok so that's all for now... here's the pics... and well... enjoy! :)

Happy Birthday!!

My family my family lalalala I sorta forgot the song.... NO WAY! I have the lirycs... but I'm deciding whether to put "My family, my family" or "We love you David our King" cause they're both like applicable.... hmmph... I'm putting both of them... just cause.

MY FAMILY, MY FAMILY

Words and music: Eli Ferguson

Intro: ---

Verse One:
I just want to tell you how much that I love you,
And you are the reason I'm living today.
Again and a gain, the Lord and you save me.
My Family, my Family, I need you today.-

Chorus:
My Family, my Family, I know it's right, my Family.
My Family, my Family, I need you today.
My Family, my Family, I know it's right, my Family.
My Family, my Family, I'll love you always.

-

Verse Two:
I'm sorry I've hurt you when going without you,
Or thinking that my way was the only way.
Again and again the Lord and you save me.
My Family, my Family, I need you today.-

[Repeat Chorus]

-

Repeat Verse One:

[Repeat Chorus Three Times]

I think this song is the sweetest ever and it expresses my very feelings.... OK so here's for "The man" who started it all...
David, Mo, Grandpa, all those names suit you... I never met you, but i know you know me... Its weird but you're cool ;)! If it wasn't for you (and the Lord ofc)  I wouldn't be here doing what i do... I'd probably be some emo girl or a goth punk person doing god-knows-what with a screwed-up life... I'm incredibly thankful for my family! All the love and the prayers and everything its like a little piece of heaven in this horrible world. I love my family to pieces!! I love THIS family to pieces! I love you all!!  Thanks "Dad"! and TYJ!!

This one's for you...
WE LOVE YOU, DAVID, OUR KING

Words: Father David ["Open Letter to Our Friends," ML 193:8], Singing Sam
Music: Singing Sam

[We All Feel the Same Inside]

Intro: ---

[*Optional: If you find it easier, speak the narration while playing this chord progression [same as song
structure]]:
-------
-----
[Repeat]

Narration*
"As for me, why they trust me, only God knows,
But I guess one reason is that I'm just a kid at heart myself,
A disillusioned teenager who understands them,
Speaks their language, thinks their thoughts,
And still has their irrepressible hopes and aspirations,
That there must be an answer somewhere,
And am willing to try anything to find a way out,
Even God's way, and believes that it can be done
No matter if no one else is doing it,
And everyone else says it can't be done.
They recognize the kindred spirit in me;
I speak their thoughts; I say and so things
The way they'd like to see them said and done;
And I have convinced them that I, too,
Do not like nor trust the older generation
And it's futile and failing domestic, religious,
Educational, economic and political systems,
And am determined to break out of the mold
Into which they've tried to pour us,
And instead find God's mold and plan for our lives,
The original one which He purposed for the world
And us that He created."

Sung:

Chorus One:
I know them and I love them.
He knows us and we love him,
And we all feel the same inside,
And we all want to do or die.

Verse:
And we believe that it's possible
To live our love,
And we love you, David, our king,
And the light of God's love will guide you,
And we will follow you through any thing.

Chorus Two:
Because we know you [we know you]
And we love you.
We need you [we need you]
And we trust you,
And we all feel the same in side,
And we all want to do or die.

[Repeat Verse]

[Repeat Chorus Two]

[Repeat Verse]

Chorus Three:
Because we know you [we know you]
And we love you.
We need you [we need you]
And we trust you,
And we all feel the same in side,
And we all want to do or die.

[Repeat six times]
And we all feel the same in side,
And we all want to do or die.

Day 3 and 4

Wow I can't beilef my time here is almost finished....:(( Gasshhh okis so here's what,...
The night before:

• Clara refused to share a bed with me so she had to sleep in the floor.... its her fault!
• Smallville was.... interesting...........
• Sleeping was horrid.... yeah all the time always for me

Day 3

• Breakfast was like wtv... I had a bowl of granola and milk.... yeay....
• Stupid Wi-Fi!.... Yeah the hotel's wi-fi connection didn't reach my room so I had to the lobby to check anything.... My dad's pc is cooler and it reaches his but not mine... well  ptl!
• The beach.... (No d'uh!) Uncle Solomon (Sandy's dad) provisioned a hotel so we could go to the private beach and use the pool and stuff.... GBY! it was awesome and incredibly fun!
• The waves.... Sandy Susie and I went had to take a ride on those waves.... no we don't surf...and waves weren't as big as to surf... So we dove into them whenever they came... or sometimes  we just let them crash against us and roll us around WAYYY FUN!!! after this is got too much salt inside my body I didn't want to go inside the ocean again the day after....
• Quiet time.... My dad was all pissed cause... cause I took my pc to the lobby to check my mail... but it was totally worht it cause i go to talk to.... ahem... yeah anyways... Quiet time was awesome!
• The beach... again.... Yeah again but it was so fun! The pool at the hotel is pretty nice so we played there things like freeze tag and chicken fights and all that....
• Sun burnt .... yeah i was sunburnt already!! whalalal but totally worth it.... i think.
• A Shower... haha yeah a little random but i love showers they are of the Lord!
• Communal dinner....  My mom told uncle Solomon that we'd all cook for one meal together (YAY!) we played stuff like "Name the biblical Character" and stuff.... so fun!
• Up! ... yeah we watched the kid's cartoon Up it was the cutest, most adorable cartoon ever! 
• Horrid sleep.... again.... oh and Clara decided to sleep on the floor again....  wtv....
• Stupid Mosquitoes!... Yeah They seem to like my blood.... too much! My legs are so scratchy and achy.....

Day 4

• Awake.... I'm awake since early in the morning ... almost every day.... so yeah I thot i could maybe sleep in but no... mom wnated us to make the best of the day so we woke up at normal time.... great!
• The Beach .... yayayayayaya well we didn't go in the ocean.... instead we decided to build a sand castle... but that didn't work out so well... we didn't get to finishing it anyways... so yeah... but it was fun to get all "SAndy" :D:D
• Picture session... Uncle Solomon  has this super nice kick ass camera.... so we had some pics take by sandy... will MAYBE post them...
• The pool.... like the day before.... fun!
• A walk by the beach.... Sandy, Susie and I walked along the beach and talked a bit... we were later joined by Johnny and Clara.
• Communal lunch... it was pretty cool my mum cooked this yummy steak and auntie Nat made noodles.. YUM!
• Ping pong.... We played a bit of ping pong and had sum fun....
• The movies/Window shopping and Ice cream ... We tried provisioning the movies but that didn't work out so we decided to go window shopping downtown Zihuatanejo (that's the name of the town where we went) and get this nice kick-ass ice cream!!! whahoo!! It was fun!! and yummy and super fun! Downtown Zihuatanejo were all these random pictures and paintings around ... cool stuff!
• Penguins of Madagascar/Love Actually.... coming back to the hotel we watched some cartoonies and half a movie (only half cause we had to go to bed...) It was cool.
• Horrid sleep... I felt like i had to hug someone or something... but I couldn't cause Clara decided to sleep on the floor again and Sandy's sleeping in the other room... and my imagination went wild.... again... oh well... so much for my sleep...

A picture's worth a thousand words and it helps you not forget...... haha kk... here they are

 

Ack I know I should have spread them out over the post.... but yeah I didn't have time ... Love you!!

Happy Birthday!

Happy birthday Marie!

to my super awesome and cool and crazy and whatnot sister! you're soo cool!! love you tonss!! xxx
Wish you the best and only that for this whole year to come!

Vacations... Day 1 and 2

Some of you may have known, other not... but i'm on a holiday! yeah taking vacations at the bach with my beast friends is the best thing ever... I will now like write down the highlights of the days and explain....

Day 1

    * waiting.... and waiting.... we had bee trying to get on the road before 12pm but It took us hours to get out the door and as soon as we go out the door... someone call us... we need to go make some pick ups before we go cause they can't keep them for the time being.... sigh well by the time we actually got out the door it was 5 pm.... ok so we got to Sandy's house around 8 (Yay!)
    * Candy.... Yeah so i dropped by the store to buy chocolates cause it was like valentines and well... no one to get candy form. so i got myself 1/2 a kilo of m&M's to share with my firends.... :D

    * We went to sleep late... yeah like really late. It happens when you sleep over... I was really anxious about a call i really wanted to make so my sleep time was for a time of about 2-3 hours that night...



Day 2.

    * I woke up early.... yeah really, really early like at 5... was really anxious about that call.
    * A phone call... I called him!!!.... yeah i finally called him... I had been thinking about calling him for like ... a really long time and today well... thanks to Sandy, i was able to call him... we sneaked out on the car to make the call thru the pc... (which btw totally made the whole yesterday wait completely worth it and made my day/week... I should call him more often ... i think its good for my mental health... )
    * A smile. We stopped at this pueblo in the middle of nowhere to witness for pocket money so we can spend. I teamed up with Susie and hey what do you know? it actually went pretty good, but not a whole lot of ppl. smiled at us....(that's not so bad cause business was bad...) There was this guy we approached... not incredibly good-looking, or anything exceptional. He looked up and saw me and smiled the most amazing smile i had seen all day. it was almost like he was happy to see us or something.... as soon as he smiled ... i forgot my lines and started stammering... lol -BLUSH- anyways he helped us and we left, as always saying thanks, and he was like the only one who said to us 'you're welcome'.... oh gosh he was hitting on me.... lol!! anyways i liked his smile....
    * Motion sickness.... the reason why i can't ever sleep inside a moving car, or read inside a moving vehicle... I get dizzy and i feel like getting out anything that ever came inside my mouth.... oh well i was doing sum stuff on my laptop and i guess that and closing my eyes for a sec made me want to throw away my breakfast.... thinking about... someone.... made it all better.
    * My future home. We went to visit my future home! gaashh!! it's amazing! I love it! well its mostly my brothers living there and this couple and a girl, they're all super cool and stuff! gee i wanna move here already! Its got all the perks... a swimming pool, jacuzzi and all... we went there for lunch and stuf... pretty awesome stuff!
    * The beach.... finally what we all came here for... the beach! the sand, and ocean and the twilight sky with a brand new moon popping up.... such a spectacular sight. sigh... i was really sorry for not having my camera with me. We had a sand fight and we swam in the ocean for awhile and were about to bury Clara... but then we had to go.
    * The hotel pool. Oh... did i mention we're staying at a hotel? yeah and the wi-fi sucks big time!! but anyways the pool's good for when you're all sandy and salty form the beach... so yeah we came back after dark and we played water games (water-tag, freeze-tag, chicken fights ect.) that was fun :)
    * Smallville.... well i still haven't seen the last one... as I'm typing this, there watching one i already saw so yeah... i'll tell you later.
    * The stupid Wi-Fi! arghh I hate it with a passion! I so want to kill it... but its dead which is why i won't be able to post this till like tomorro phhtt!!
    * Its late.... and I should be like watching the next smallville Love you guys! I will go to bed.... sometime in the early morning and I, will be writign more later....
    * Oh crap.... I forgot about pictures..... Well i WILL post them.... laters.... just laters....

--Love!

ok... for the pics....

Random Valentines Thots...

Well sort of like "Haiku's" Johnny and I brainstormed the other night and well... these came out.... have funn and Happy Lover's day....

I'll be yours if you'll be mine
Oh shit, I already used that line
how about will you be mine?
dammit! such unoriginal valentine--Me


I like your hair
i dislike your nose               
your pants are squared
and your butt looks gross
ewwww!!!
Hahah! Jk JK!!! Happy valentines... :D--Johnny

I would send you chocolates but that'd give you pimples...
i'd give you roses but they'd die before getting to you...
i'd write a poem but i can't think of something to say...
so i'll just wish you a happy valentines the way i do...
happy valentines...
(i'd flash you on the webcam but your internet is so slow). -- Me


Valentines is a holiday invented by greeting card companies to make you feel like shit!!!!--Johnny



If cupid already shot a dart
at your vulnerable heart             
I know the dude you fell for
Is a lucky son of a... door...man :D

JK! Happy valentines!-- Me



If flowers make you feel better
I'd send one with a letter...
but i'm just a poor tramp          
who can't afford a stamp
so I send you this offline
to wish you a happy valentine.--Me

I can't say something that'll make you feel better
but if you're in love with someone... go get her!
I sure wish you the very bestest of luck
oh no... i just got stuck...
well happy valentines! :D--Me




LMAO!!
Happy Valentinees day!!!!

Test results....

YAY -jumps up and down- I... I... PASSED!!! Yes thanks you guys for all of your prayers and stuff... I passed with... a passing grade :D.
Phew... all those fried brains were worth it... so that's 9 down 25 to go. Oh yeah, this is they have the exams numerated them by tens' so the first semester is 10 and the second is 20 and the 3rd 30 and so on, so i thot there actually were 60 exams... but there are only 33 that i HAVE to do, so yes, hopefully i will pass the next ones too... Guys please, please keep praying!!!!
Love youuu!!!

A Heartless Fool

I keep writing poetry off my heart. I keep sending pieces of my heart to people i have never even seen. "One day," someone told me, "You'll be a heartless fool". But its only natural that I be this way. Loving and giving everything (and even sometimes hurting myself in the process), for love itself.
How strange, how odd can humans be. Specially one like me, but hey, loving people and giving my heart awayis part of me, its who i am. And hopefully one day, I have given/recieved enough pieces of hearts... and still not be "A heartless fool".

De-motivation

 

............ that's depressing!

My weekend (Thank God for Mondays)

Wow... this whole weekend has been sooo stressing... sigh!
I hardly had time to sleep or eat... just do school... i finished 4 tests this weekend, 2 on saturday and 2 on sunday... my brain is like literally fried. I still have math to get over with this next week, and language, and the other test i was like supposed to pass but i flunked... i won't have the tests till the 20th but i have to get over the books already.
My feet hurt like the dickens... i walked back home from school both saturday and sunday... not wearing the most ideal pair of shoes for walking. I got home with blisters on my ankles, and my feet were literally bleeding, ouch!
Also on Sturdday we went to the scouts... they get together here at the park every Saturday... I was soo tired, after my tests and my dad said i had to go with my sibs to the scouts, so i went... it was fun, but my arms feel like falling off now....
I'm falling asleep in my pc... i won't post this till morning cause i just... i need my sleep!
-yawns-
(if only i could sleep)
Oh hey tomorrow's monday, and i'm hoping to catch a certain person on... -wink wink- hopefully we can talk for some time and catch up a bit . okai my bed is calling me and i'm not resisting... goodnight!